Rush Bowers, "Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?"
One of the more interesting components of our time here in Austria is our weekly German lesson, led by defensive backs coach Rush Bowers. Rush is a native of Michigan, and came to Germany four years ago to teach English. Eventually he meandered down to Innsbruck, and having played quarterback at Western Michigan, soon came in contact with the Raiders. He has been helping with the team ever since, and even played a few games under center during the 2006 season. Rush now works directly for Swarco, coaches our DBs, manages the English content on the Raider's website (
www.raiders.at), and freely quotes such classic movies as
Billy Madison and
The Big Lebowski. Oh yeah, he's also fluent at German and an excellent teacher!
The Raiders meeting room turned into a classroom - that's what I call being a PROFESSIONAL Student Athlete!
Let me begin by saying that German is not the easiest language to learn. There are many tricky rules, the average word has at least 14 letters & 6 syllables, and many of the sounds require a mixture of choking and the first stages of vomiting. There are dots over letters (officially known as the Umlaut, occurring over three vowels making their sounds long: ä, ö and ü)
and a symbol not found in English, the "ß" or Scharfes S - "Sharp S" - that looks like a capital B. However DEUTSCH is one of the world's major languages, the most widely spoken mother tongue in the European Union, Much of that has to do with the Austrian-centered Habsburg Empire that dominated Central and Eastern Europe, making it the language of commerce, government, and the main one used by European townspeople until the mid 19th century. Today there are 105 million native speakers around the globe. I'm trying to make it 105,000,001.
Rush often has a puzzled look when talking us, which we return with blank stares and random guesses.
We are trying our best to learn, however there are three factors working against us:
1) OTHER LANGUAGES. German is complicated, especially with about eight other languages floating in my head. This wouldn't normally be a problem, but as we have traveled around, I have not mastered any of them. Thus random words just seem to float into my mind. So far, in addition to the English I know and the Spanish I studied in school, I've picked up about 2% of Italian (Sicily), German (Austria), Portuguese (Brazil), Japanese (from a trip there two years ago), and Dutch (really only know two sentences from our friend in Holland but both cannot be repeated here.)
For those of you who have traveled and encountered a foreign speaker who doesn't know English, the first words you usually try are the non-English ones you know. For me, that meant on my first trip to Tokyo I was saying "Hola" (Spanish hello) to everyone. That drew some weird looks. Now with all these languages, you end up saying sentences like,
Scusi por mi amico [excuse my friend, ITALIAN], he's a little [ENGLISH] langsam [slow, GERMAN] y es por que [and that's why, SPANISH] he rides [ENGLISH] il autobus piccollo [the short bus, ITALIAN]. Tudo bem? [It's all good, PORTUGUESE]
2) LOCAL DIALECT. Just as learning Sicilian is slightly different than Italian, the Austrian's here in the Tirol region speak their own version of German. It's a little more guttural, a little deeper, and filled with much more slang. They are also not nearly as formal as those trying to speak Hochdeutsch, or High German as those in Berlin would have you believe. I think this sort of local flavor is actually really cool, as after I leave I can identify with two really unique groups of people! (Not many other Sicilian-Tirolean travelers out there!)
3) EVERYONE HERE SPEAKS ENGLISH. Despite Rush's efforts and the fact that 89% of Austrians speak German as their first language, it seems that EVERYONE here in Innsbruck speaks English, and wants to talk to you that way. This is much different that in Sicily, where we were fully immersed at times as the only Americans for probably miles. Here, even the young kids will throw American slang in your face and quote rap music. Therefore, we try to speak German when possible but are usually met with one of two responses: a) The other person replies in English anyways (probably due to our lack of lederhosen) or b) About 45 seconds of uninterrupted German with the other person laughing and nodding like we understand.
I don't cheat, I just take pictures of other people's notes. (Thanks Menyada!)
All joking and quasi-interesting tangents aside, there are actually some cool things I have picked up so far in class. Here's a few take-home lessons you can throw out at your next cocktail party to sound educated on Tirolean German:
SERVUS: The German Aloha
While Americans think of German greetings and immediately go with the standard guten tag - good day - the actual people here are far more laid back. Especially in Tirol, where the standard greeting here is SERVUS (SEHR-voos), used in the same way that Hawaiians use Aloha: hello, goodbye, and sometimes everything else in between. (Not to be confused with Bitten - welcome - which is used like the Italians use Prego.)
That doesn't mean that greetings are simple. This is still German. There are lots of other ways to say hello, the most typical ones being "hallo" (heard regularly on the street) and Gruß Gott! (Literally God's Greetings!) There are also many ways to say goodbye, my favorite being Tshus which is pronounced like "JUICE" and literally just means bye. HOWEVER, if you want to sound local in Austria or Bavaria, throw out the SERVUS and see people smile!
Auf Wiedersehen: Ruined by the Song
Speaking of greetings, the very formal German "Auf Wiedersehen" is rarely used, and actually pronounced far differently than how Americans sing along to the 1952 Billboard #1 hit by Vera Lynn. If you want to pronounce it like a local, the S is really like a Z and the last syllable is like "Zay-en." Stupid Americanos!
EXCUSE ME: The Very Fun to say Entschuldigung
I think perhaps my favorite word so far in German has to be the word for "Excuse Me" - Entshuldigung. It's pronounced far more fun that you see on paper. For proper pronunciation, you really don't say the first three letters (Ent), instead you put an almost sing-song accent on the "SHUL" and match that to the final syllable, the "Gung." Therefore, it is said like this, "SHOOOOOOOL-di-GOOOOOONG." I find myself on crowded streets just walking around like a human bowling bowl so that I can bump into as many people as possible just so I can use that phrase.
Useful Phrase: Alles fit im Schritt?
This last phrase is a common take off on a standard question, and rhymes so it is really fun to say... but be careful, it has the potential to be embarrassing. The first part is very simple -- "Alles fit" is like "All good?" or "All in place?" but the rhyming part got one Mr. Rush Bowers in trouble as he was teaching Germna. He heard a student say this to him during his first months in Europe, and thought it was like a cool local slang way to ask if people were good. He started throwing it out to friends and co-workers, usually getting a little smile and polite response. However, the more he used it he noticed that it might mean a little more than his conniving student let on. Finally, after asking the wife of the school principle this question, she pulled him aside with a menacing look and said, "Do you know you are asking if everything is good in my crotch?" CLASSIC!
Alles fit im schritt? Sometimes the teacher is pleased with his students!
REALLY PLAYING FOR PIZZA NOTE: Rush has not double checked this post, so there are probably a plethora of errors, a ton of exagerration, and some very offensive stereotypes. For that, I only have one thing to say,
"ent-SHOOOOOOOL-di-GOOOOOOONG!"
~ J. Twice
