McInsanity

It was pitch black as we crawled along against the flow of traffic through Agrigento.  Our heads were weary.  Our legs tired.  Our Garmin GPS system continued to scold us for going the wrong way as we looked for some familiar landmark to get us back on the beaten track… and then – there it was.  Floating above all other buildings in the area, it’s yellow glow illuminating the night sky like an angel: THE GOLDEN ARCHES.

Yes, it was time for our first visit to the American Embassy of Italy, McDonald’s.  We had spent a long day of driving and exploring the spectacular Greek Ruins in Agrigento, and the last thing we wanted to do begin another expedition, this time for food.  So dutifully, like a mesquito drawn to the glow of a bug-zapper, we followed the tractor beam into the parking lot.  However, because we were visiting McInsanity – the Italian version of McDonald’s – there were hundreds of cars in the parking lot, as this was clearly the place to be on a Tuesday evening.  Like George says, "Kinda like being on Everest and being forced to eat your dead climbing partner for food... something you just gotta do."  Sensitive?  No.  Accurate?  Yes.

Upon entering, the screams of children filled the air from multiple 5 year-old birthday parties.  It seems that everywhere on the planet, Ronald McDonald is building his army.

“McDonald’s?  I don’t want to be affiliated with that CLOWN.  He attracts too many children!” – Mitch Hedburg

As we reach the counter, the scene from Pulp Fiction plays out in my head… the one where John Travolta’s character explains to Samuel L. Jackson why in Europe the “Quarter Pounder with Cheese” is known as “Royale with Cheese” (Metric System, duh).  My eyes glance to the menu… but decide not to go with “McRoyale” – apparently the Italian version of movie lore – and instead choose the same order I have been conditioned to choose since I was one of those screaming children (2 hamburgers, fries, and a Coke). 

Let me just tell you… McDonald’s around the world tastes just like… McDonald’s.  I was home.  And just like in North America, Coke tastes best at McDonald’s.  (Does anyone know their recipe???)

Now if I could just convince them to actually give me a refill…

~ J. Twice