Cars in Italy make me laugh... such as this single seater, 3 wheeler.
I love Italy. It is truly an amazing place. But Italy is also pretty freakin' funny. I'm talking about everything. I walk around all day laughing... I think I'm currently ranked 4th in the world with a 85.4 laughs per hour rating. (And it's a good thing that laughing burns calories because something over here had to off-set the Cannoli!)
Graphiti is also very comical here... usually centered around either love or soccer. In this great piece of art, the unknown artist has made the statement that "PALERMO EQUALS AIDS." That might be the single best piece of trash talk EVER.
That being said, I thought I'd share just a few of the funny things that make me laugh on a daily basis... not the small things (such as McDonald's charging 10 cents per ketchup or the lack of ice and refills anywhere in the country or the fact that the company selected to install our internet is in Sardinia), but some of the more constant things that we come across... hopefully these will make you LOL or SAC as well! Enjoy!
1. DRESSING FOR THE SEASONS. OK, the date is currently March 18th... its 70 degrees outside EVERY DAY... and people here are wearing PARKAS, SWEATERS, PANTS, and SCARVES... simply because the Calendar says "Winter." Now, I realize it will soon be over 100 everyday (40+ for anyone outside the U.S.), and you will not have the opportunity to be wearing all your designer looks, but SWEAT SHOULD NOT BE RUNNING DOWN YOUR FOREHEAD!
In a related story, Christie went into CityPer -- our local supermarket / drug-store -- on a 75 degree day last week and asked where she could find sunscreen or suntan lotion, as we have been spending a lot of time in the sun over here and were starting to get burned. The puzzled clerk looked at her, and said with a straight face, "Sunscreen? I'm sorry, but we only sell that in the summer! Why would you need it now?" Good question... you don't need sunscreen, especially if you are wearing a large coat.
2. SMOKING. If you were to list the three biggest sins in the entire United States, they would probably be Murder, Rape, and Smoking. In Canada, laws are being passed that prohibit anyone from smoking within 50 feet of a building. It's just no longer "cool" to be the Marlboro Man. This apparently has not spread to the great kingdom of Italy, as everyone over the age of 12 is actually required by law to smoke a minimum of 3 packs per day. Now, I know I am exaggerating (slightly) -- but I seriously have seen so many people smoking here that people in France are in danger of inhaling second hand smoke, just by living in an adjacent country.
When Christie went to a movie last night, they actually brought the lights up halfway through for an intermission (of a one hour and 15 minute film) so that people can smoke. I think I am going to start smoking as well... but only so I can keep my Italian endorsement deals.
3. DRIVING. I know George has commented at length about the driving here, but it really is comical... or actually, amazing, to think that there are not more accidents. The closest description I have come up with is "Grand Theft Auto" Video Game meets Star Wars "Death Star Tunnel" at the end of Return of the Jedi. The basic theories of Italian driving include: 1) Never Look, 2) Never Yield, 3) Never Slow Down. If you can remember those basic concepts, then you will be fine over here.
Another 3-wheeler, this road hazard has been known to drop oranges as additional moving obstacles.
This car is actually a wheel chair... with an outer shell to protect it from the harsh winters of Sicily.
~ J. Twice
1 comment:
Jason, I don't know if you've run into this yet ... but Marlboro actually has a high-end line of CLOTHING STORES (not surprisingly, very Marlboro Man Western in look) in Italy, and perhaps in the rest of Europe for all I know. I actually like some of the stuff, but can't quite bring myself to buy a shirt with a little Marlboro Man logo on the pocket.
To me, that's the best sign of how differently they view smoking. Wearing something from a cigarette company here would be akin to walking around wearing a T-shirt saying "I torture puppies" or something.
Oh, and you're lucky you're living someplace where they don't actually have winter. When it's cold, the smokers all congregate right in the doorways of buildings. Not only is it hard to get in and out, but you can consume about half a pack just entering and exiting a building.
Enjoying the blog a lot.
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